“See to it that no one falls short of the grace of God and that no bitter root grows up to cause trouble and defile many."
Hebrews 12:15 (NIV) If you’re still holding on to resentment, then someone is controlling you. Have you ever said, “You make me so mad”? That’s an admission that the other person is controlling you. The only way to get this person out of your mind and heart is to heal the hurt with God’s grace. Hebrews 12:15 says, “See to it that no one falls short of the grace of God and that no bitter root grows up to cause trouble and defile many” (NIV). Have you ever known a family where a bitter parent poisoned the whole family? Bitterness is contagious, and it can actually become generational. Someone needs to break the chain—and if bitterness has taken root in your family, that someone can be you. Are your parents bitter because their parents were bitter because their parents were bitter? It’s time to break the chain. And there’s only one way to break it: with grace. Friends, if you don’t get God’s grace in your life, life will make you bitter. Why? Because there is sin in the world. We live on a broken planet. This is not heaven. Evil people get away with evil things all the time. Life is not fair. Is forgiveness fair? Absolutely not. But forgiveness is not about fairness. It’s not about getting even. It’s about grace. You don’t forgive a person because it’s the fair thing to do. You forgive a person because it’s the right thing to do, and you don’t want your own heart full of poison. You don’t want to hold on to the hurt and the hate. Forgiveness is free, but it is not cheap. It cost Jesus his life. It cost God his Son. As Jesus was dying on the cross, with his arms outstretched, he said, “Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing” (Luke 23:34 NIV). It’s like he was saying, “I love you, I love you, I love you.” In effect, he said, “They don’t deserve it. They don’t even know what they’re doing. But, Father, forgive them anyway.” Follow Jesus’ example and offer forgiveness today. Heal your bitterness with his grace.
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“Never avenge yourselves, but leave it to the wrath of God, for it is written, ‘Vengeance is mine, I will repay, says the Lord.’”
Romans 12:19 (ESV) Life is not fair. God never said it would be! Life is unfair because there is sin in the world. Jesus came to make things right, and, one day, they will be. But, right now, sometimes bad people prosper. Sometimes good people suffer. Sometimes innocent people get hurt. If you have been discriminated against because of your race, culture, language, or gender, if you’ve been abused, if you have been harassed or mistreated—God has seen every hurt in your life, and he grieves over injustice, too. So why didn’t he stop it? God could stop all the evil in the world just like that. But it would mean taking away our freedom to choose. God may not stop a hurt from happening, but God is keeping a record. Not only that, but he’s “storing up your tears in a bottle” (Psalm 56:8). The Bible also says, “Never avenge yourselves, but leave it to the wrath of God, for it is written, ‘Vengeance is mine, I will repay, says the Lord’” (Romans 12:19 ESV). Because God is loving, he is also a God of justice. To allow evil to hurt his children and not seek justice would be unloving. Since God seeks justice, you don’t have to spend your life holding on to hurts. In fact, God doesn’t want you to waste one second of your life on resentment, retaliation, or revenge. That’s just going to fill you with the poison of bitterness. Don’t waste your life on bitterness! Some might be allowing people who hurt you 10 years ago to still hurt you today because you’re holding on to the memory of that hurt. That’s foolish! They can only hurt you when you choose to hold on to the hurt. You have to let it go. Justice delayed is not justice denied. God is very aware of what people have done to you, and there will be a day of reckoning. Do you trust him? If you do, you’ll let it go. Surrender your hurt to Jesus, and let him settle the score. “A stone is heavy and sand is weighty, but the resentment caused by a fool is even heavier.”
Proverbs 27:3 (NLT) Any time you breathe bitterness, you suffocate your spirit. Bitterness doesn’t just choke out your happiness and your healthy emotions. It also strangles your spirit. When you have bitterness in your heart, you can’t breathe spiritually. Bitterness will only weigh you down and depress your spirit. Proverbs 27:3 says, “A stone is heavy and sand is weighty, but the resentment caused by a fool is even heavier” (NLT). Choosing bitterness is like choosing to carry around a huge weight with you everywhere you go, all the time. It’s an unnecessary load, but you’ve made the choice to bear it. Sometimes you may think you can hurt the person who hurt you by holding on to what happened—that by staying mad, the other person will become miserable. But bitterness is a worthless weapon. It doesn’t hurt the other person. It only makes you miserable. The person that hurt you is probably not even aware that you’re thinking about them all the time. Bitterness is like drinking poison and hoping it kills the person that hurt you. But that person is out there somewhere, eating a steak dinner and living their best life. They’re not even thinking about you! They’ve already moved on with their life. It’ll be a waste of your time to keep trying to use bitterness as a weapon. You’re only going to hurt yourself. You may have been hurt by someone a long time ago, and I’m sorry you had to experience that pain. But here’s the good news: They can’t hurt you anymore! The only way they can continue to hurt you is if you choose to hold on to the hurt and replay it over and over in your mind. The Bible says in Job 18:4, “You are only hurting yourself with your anger” (GNT). You don’t have to hurt anymore. Let go of your hurt. Surrender it to God. When you do, you’ll breathe in the fresh, sweet air of freedom and be able to move forward with purpose. “Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice. Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.” (Ephesians 4:31-32 NIV)
Everyone who is alive will be hurt, many times over. Sometimes you will be hurt intentionally. Other times someone will accidentally hurt you. The way you respond to hurt will determine how it affects you. If you forgive, you can move on and find happiness. If you become bitter, you can let one hurt wreck your entire lifetime. You will find that bitterness is a boomerang. It always comes back and hurts you more than anyone else. Paul, one of the early Christians, talks about how destructive bitterness is. In his letter to the church at Ephesus, he says, “Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice. Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you” (Ephesians 4:31-32 NIV). What is the antidote to the poison of bitterness? Forgiveness. Paul tells you to follow the example of God, who forgives you in Christ. Is there anyone you may be bitter against? An old boyfriend or girlfriend? An employer? A former spouse? A parent or child? A teacher, neighbor, or friend? Let Jesus flush that bitterness out of your system. Choose to forgive that person, like God forgives you. Let God set you free from bitterness and make room for kindness and compassion in your heart. When Jesus was teaching his followers how to pray, he told them to say this: “Forgive us our debts, as we also have forgiven our debtors” (Matthew 6:12 NIV). In essence that’s saying, “Lord, forgive me as much as I forgive everybody else.” That is a tough standard! But if you follow it, and forgive people in the same way you want to be forgiven, it will help keep bitterness away. You may have been hurt deeply. You may think it’s impossible for you to forgive—and it may be impossible for you to forgive on your own. That’s why you need Jesus Christ. Only the power of God can replace hate with love and set you free from the bitterness that can grow from deep hurts. “We know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose” (Romans 8:28 NIV).
We’re all broken people. We’re all imperfect. Sometimes we hurt each other intentionally or unintentionally. Life isn’t fair. Innocent people suffer. Everyone has experienced unfair or prejudicial treatment in some way. How do you respond to it? If you start dwelling on it and stewing, spewing, and worrying, your soul takes a hit. Grudges over what others have done to you will hurt your soul, impairing your thoughts, emotions, and decisions. Resentment, bitterness, retaliation, and revenge will damage you. The Bible actually says that God’s going to even the score. Judgment is coming one day. People who were mistreated, misjudged, or treated unfairly will receive justice. But it is not your job to avenge yourself: “Never avenge yourselves. Leave that to God, for he has said that he will repay those who deserve it” (Romans 12:19 TLB). Unaddressed grudges blind you to how much good God has done in your life. You become blind to the truth. You become blind to the needs of people around you. Your soul will not be restored until you let it go. That’s what Jesus wants to help you do. God wants to restore your soul, taking the bitter things in your life and turning them into better things. Romans 8:28 says, “We know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose (NIV). Of course, we know that not everything that happens to you is good. But can God take the bad things people do to you and use them for good? Yes. Can God take your sins and mistakes and bring good out of them? Yes. Can God take your own weaknesses and your damaged will and work good even then? Yes. Anybody can bring good out of good, but God specializes in bringing good out of bad. God turns your hurts into holiness. He turns your wounds into wisdom. He uses offenses to remove your pretenses. When you believe that God can bring good things out of very bad things, he will begin to rebuild your soul—your broken thoughts, your broken emotions, and your broken will. “Stupid people express their anger openly, but sensible people are patient and hold it back” (Proverbs 29:11 GNT).
Anger confounds many people in our world today. We simply don’t know how to handle our anger like we have in the past. One of the Bible’s simplest yet most profound answers for our anger comes in Proverbs 29:11: “Stupid people express their anger openly, but sensible people are patient and hold it back” (GNT). Think before you speak. Delay is a tremendous remedy for anger. You don’t need to delay indefinitely. If you’ve got an issue you need to deal with, you need to do so. Anger delayed indefinitely becomes bitterness. That’s worse than anger. Anger isn’t always a sin. Bitterness is. If you respond impulsively, you tend to respond in anger. If you wait to talk about whatever conflict you’re dealing with, you’ll be more rational and reasonable when you do. The longer you hold your temper, the better your response will be. Give yourself time to think. When conflict arises and you give yourself time to think, what should you think about? Consider these five questions: T: Is it truthful? Is what I’m about to say the truth? H: Is it helpful? Or will it simply harm the other person? I: Is it inspirational? Does it build up or does it tear down? N: Is it necessary? If it’s not necessary, why do I need to say it? K: Is it kind? THINK before you speak. Reflect before you react. It’ll slow down your anger every time. Get rid of all the filth and evil in your lives, and humbly accept the word God has planted in your hearts, for it has the power to save your souls." (James 1:21 NLT)
We've all noticed that the quality of reception on a cell phone varies widely. The same is true with you. You must be positioned correctly in order to hear God speak. Sometimes we never give God a chance to talk to us. We've made up our minds. We want to do what we want to do, not what God wants us to do. Our hearts are hardened, and we're unwilling to listen. When you have a closed mind, of course He's not going to talk to you! But if you really want to hear from God - and what believer doesn't? - you have to understand what is keeping you from hearing from God. There are three mental barriers that keep your mind closed to God's message. 1. Pride. If you think you don't need God in your life and want to handle things yourself, you're probably not listening for God to speak. Pride keeps you from being open to the possibility that God might want to say something to you. 2. Fear. A lot of people can't hear God speak because they're afraid to hear God speak. Maybe you think that hearing God's voice makes you some kind of religious fanatic. 3. Bitterness. When you hold on to hurt, resentment, or a grudge, then you're not going to be able to hear God, because your heart is hardened. It has grown cold and made you defensive, even to God's love. Some of you have been hurt badly, whether it happened this week or years ago, and you're still holding on to it. I want to tell you that you've got to let it go. Not for their sake, but for your sake. The resentment is killing you! Resentment is a self-inflicted wound that allows people from your past to continue to hurt you today. You need to let it go, not because they deserve forgiveness but because you need to get on with your life. You need to get rid of the bitterness, fear, and pride that keep you from hearing God's voice and living out His purpose for your life. James 1:21 says, "Therefore put away all filthiness and rampant wickedness and receive with meekness the implanted word, which is able to save your souls." (ESV). "Receive with meekness, or humbly accept," means you let go of your pride and stop trying to figure it out on your own. This is the key to opening your mind and heart so that you can hear from the Lord. |
AuthorTaken from Daily Hope by Rick Warren. Categories
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