“Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice. Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.”
Ephesians 4:31-32 (NIV) Too many of us don’t really understand what forgiveness is. I’m convinced that if more people knew what real forgiveness looked like, they’d be much more willing to forgive instead of holding on to past hurts at an unhealthy level. The Bible clearly calls us to forgive others. Galatians 6:1 says, “Brothers and sisters, if someone is caught in a sin, you who live by the Spirit should restore that person gently” (NIV). So if God expects us to forgive others, what does healthy, biblical forgiveness look like? Here’s a four-part process that we should walk through as we’re dealing with pain brought upon by others. First, recognize no one is perfect. When we hate somebody, we tend to lose our perspective about that person. When we’re filled with resentment and bitterness and hurt, we tend to dehumanize the offender. But we’re all in the same boat. The Bible says, “Not a single person on earth is always good and never sins” (Ecclesiastes 7:20 NLT). We’re all imperfect. Next, relinquish your right to get even. This is the heart of forgiveness. The Bible says, “Never avenge yourselves. Leave that to God, for he has said that he will repay those who deserve it” (Romans 12:19 TLB). You may feel like you have the right to retaliate, but you must commit to not doing so. It may not seem fair, but it’s healthy. And this isn’t a one-time decision but a daily one that may even require moment-by-moment decisions. Then, respond to evil with good. It’s nearly impossible to do this without God’s help. You’ll need the love of Jesus to fill you up. Why? Because God’s love doesn’t keep track of wrongs (see 1 Corinthians 13). Finally, refocus on God’s plan for your life. You stop focusing on the hurt and the person who hurt you. Instead, you refocus on God’s purpose for your life, which is greater than any problem or pain you might be currently facing. As long as you continue to focus on the person who has hurt you, that person controls you. In fact, if you don’t release your offender, you will begin to resemble your offender. Don’t spend another day in your resentment. If you’ve been holding on to pain caused by someone else, go through these four steps and move on to the rest of the life you were created to live!
0 Comments
“If you do not forgive others, then your Father will not forgive the wrongs you have done.”
Matthew 6:15 (GNT) If you are unwilling to forgive someone and you don’t want God to forgive them either, that reveals bitterness and resentment in your life. If you want someone else to be punished but you expect forgiveness for the bad things you’ve done, you’ll just make yourself miserable. You’re not hurting them; you’re only hurting yourself. Jesus said, “If you do not forgive others, then your Father will not forgive the wrongs you have done” (Matthew 6:15 GNT). Forgiveness involves your past, present, and future:
Consider Jonah. After he warned the people of Nineveh about God’s judgment, they repented, so God forgave them and didn’t punish them. This disappointed Jonah and made him bitter. But remember how Jonah originally turned away from God? He wanted God’s forgiveness for his own sin of disobeying. Yet he didn’t want God to forgive the Ninevites. So Jonah prayed, “I knew that you are a loving and merciful God, always patient, always kind, and always ready to change your mind and not punish. Now then, LORD, let me die. I am better off dead than alive” (Jonah 4:2-3 GNT). Jonah’s resentment was only hurting himself. The Ninevites were enjoying the grace of God while Jonah was wallowing in self-pity. It’s critical that you forgive anyone from your past who has hurt you—and that you forgive anyone who wrongs you today. Why? Because God has forgiven you for your past sins, and he has promised to forgive you in the future. “If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness” (1 John 1:9 NIV). “Make allowance for each other’s faults, and forgive anyone who offends you. Remember, the Lord forgave you, so you must forgive others.”
Colossians 3:13 (NLT) A lot of people think God carries grudges. They picture God up in heaven, waiting to zap them for anything they do wrong. Here’s what God is really like: “I am the God who forgives your sins, and I do this because of who I am. I will not hold your sins against you” (Isaiah 43:25 GNT). God wants to forgive, and he has done everything necessary to forgive your sins in Christ. Even before the world was made, God was already planning in Christ to forgive your sins. He knows every wrong thing you’re going to do. None of it surprises him! Before you were born, God made a plan to offer you forgiveness for all the guilt that’s in your life. That’s why God can say this: “Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus” (Romans 8:1 NIV). Condemnation is gone because of what Jesus Christ did for us. He offers unconditional, complete, consistent, eternal, by-grace forgiveness in all of our lives. What a relief! You don’t have to suffer or pay for your sins now or in eternity. They’re paid for by Jesus Christ. You are forgiven if you accept that gift of salvation from Jesus. Once you recognize that you’re forgiven, you are then enabled and strengthened to forgive other people. How do you do that? “Make allowance for each other’s faults, and forgive anyone who offends you. Remember, the Lord forgave you, so you must forgive others” (Colossians 3:13 NLT). Take a good look at yourself, and you may see ugliness, selfishness, and sin. But the important thing is how God sees you. You are his creation, a masterpiece designed to live for him and bless others. When you take a good look through God’s eyes, you see the forgiveness that only he can give. By accepting his forgiveness in your life, you’ll be able to offer it to others. “Make allowance for each other’s faults, and forgive anyone who offends you. Remember, the Lord forgave you, so you must forgive others.”
Colossians 3:13 (NLT) You’ve heard it before—and maybe experienced yourself—that opposites attract. When you’re single and see somebody that’s not like you, it’s fascinating. You find their characteristics and personality traits that are not like yours exciting and attractive. Then you get in a relationship or you get married, and a year later, all those exciting traits suddenly turn annoying. What once attracted you now makes you want to attack them! Unrealistic expectations in relationships set us up for resentment. Often it’s not the big things in life that make us resentful. A lot of little things can start to pile up. The irritations turn into resentment, and it’s easy to forget why you loved that person in the first place. We are all imperfect. You’re going to hurt people, and people are going to hurt you, whether or not it’s intentional. It’s a fact that you’re going to be hurt in life. The question is, what are you doing to do with that hurt? Are you going to let it make you better, or are you going to let it make you bitter? Resentment won’t just make you bitter. It will also destroy your relationships. The people we love the most are the ones we often end up resenting the most. The antidote to resentment is forgiveness. Resentment tears down relationships, but forgiveness builds them up. If you’re going to have meaningful relationships that last a lifetime, then you’re going to need massive doses of forgiveness. Colossians 3:13 says, “Make allowance for each other’s faults, and forgive anyone who offends you. Remember, the Lord forgave you, so you must forgive others” (NLT). Don’t let resentment build up in your life because you’re holding on to a grudge. You’re only hurting yourself! You’ve got to let it go and forgive so that you can start living a life of purpose. “God has done it all! He sent Christ to make peace between himself and us, and he has given us the work of making peace between himself and others. What we mean is that God was in Christ, offering peace and forgiveness to the people of this world. And he has given us the work of sharing his message about peace. We were sent to speak for Christ, and God is begging you to listen to our message. We speak for Christ and sincerely ask you to make peace with God."
2 Corinthians 5:18-20 (CEV) In 1956, five American missionaries headed to the rainforest of the eastern Amazon in Ecuador to make a second visit to the isolated Huaorani tribe. The people had a culture of killing, and anthropological studies suggest as much as 54 percent of the tribe died by homicide. Soon after the missionaries got out of the plane, they were speared to death by members of the tribe. The brutal murders made news around the world and were on the covers of Life magazine, Time, and Newsweek. Many newspapers reported the deaths of these men, who included Nate Saint and Jim Elliot. A couple years later, Elisabeth and Valerie Elliot (wife and daughter of Jim) and Rachel Saint (sister of Nate) moved into the Huaorani village to show love and forgiveness and minister to the people who had killed their family. Eventually, Mincaye, the leader of the tribe, and the five men who participated in the missionary murders all became Christians. The kind of forgiveness that Elisabeth Elliot and Rachel Saint modeled doesn’t make sense until you have been forgiven by God. Once you’ve experienced God’s forgiveness, how do you forgive? You do the four things that these women did. Relinquish your right to get even. Romans 12:19 says, “Don’t try to get even. Let God take revenge” (CEV). Leave it up to God. He’ll take care of it, and he’ll do a much better job than you ever could. Respond to evil with good. How can you tell when you’ve completely forgiven someone? You can actually pray for God to bless the person who hurt you. The Bible says, “Do good to those who hate you, bless those who curse you, pray for those who mistreat you” (Luke 6:27-28 NIV). Repeat these steps as long as necessary. The book of Matthew records a conversation about forgiveness between Jesus and Peter: “Peter came up to the Lord and asked, ‘How many times should I forgive someone who does something wrong to me? Is seven times enough?’ Jesus answered: ‘Not just seven times, but seventy-seven times!’” (CEV). Sometimes forgiveness is continual. Rescue others with the Good News of God’s forgiveness. The Bible says in 2 Corinthians 5:18-20, “God has done it all! He sent Christ to make peace between himself and us, and he has given us the work of making peace between himself and others. What we mean is that God was in Christ, offering peace and forgiveness to the people of this world. And he has given us the work of sharing his message about peace. We were sent to speak for Christ, and God is begging you to listen to our message. We speak for Christ and sincerely ask you to make peace with God.” Forgiveness is difficult. But it becomes easier when you stop trying to forgive on your own and, instead, forgive others because God has already forgiven you. “A heart at peace gives life to the body, but envy rots the bones."
Proverbs 14:30 (NIV) Some people tend to think of their body as completely separate from their spirit. But the truth is, there is a direct connection between your spiritual health and your physical health. In fact, the Bible is full of health advice you’re probably not going to read about in a nutrition book. Here are four things from Scripture you can do to live a healthier life. Trust in God. In life, you’ll either worship or worry. You’ll either pray or panic. The Bible says in Psalms 116:7, “I said to myself, ‘Relax, because the Lord takes care of you’” (NCV). God wants you to trust him and relax. He will take care of you! Confess your sin. One of the healthiest things you can do is to receive God’s forgiveness. Don’t repress or suppress your sin. Instead, express it to God. If you don’t talk to God about your sin, you’ll take it out on your body. This happened to David: “When I refused to confess my sin, my body wasted away, and I groaned all day long . . . My strength evaporated . . . Finally, I confessed all my sins to you and stopped trying to hide my guilt . . . And you forgave me! All my guilt is gone” (Psalm 32:3-5 NLT). Give generously. It’s not a mistake that the words “miser” and “miserable” have the same root. Misers are miserable; they’re always sad. But givers are always glad. Proverbs 11:25 says, “The generous will prosper; those who refresh others will themselves be refreshed” (NLT). Did you know there are more promises in the Bible about giving and generosity than about any other subject? God is a giving God, and he wants you to learn to be like him. Every time you give, your heart grows bigger—and you break the miserable grip of materialism. Have fun. Life is meant to be enjoyed, not merely endured. In fact, the Bible says that God created everything for your enjoyment. 1 Timothy 6:17 says, “They should place their confidence in God who richly provides us with everything to enjoy” (GW). You’ll often hear people say, “The family who prays together stays together.” That’s true. But it’s also true to say, “The family who plays together stays together.” You need to enjoy life. You need to have fun. Friends, it’s not just what you eat that matters. It’s what eats you. You can take the best probiotics and eat fresh, healthy, and organic foods. But if you’re resentful against your dad, envious of your friend, or guilty about something you did yesterday, it will rot your bones: “A heart at peace gives life to the body, but envy rots the bones” (Proverbs 14:30 NIV). But when you look to God—with trust, confession, generosity, and fun—he fills you with peace. “Because Jesus was raised from the dead, we’ve been given a brand-new life and have everything to live for, including a future in heaven—and the future starts now!”
1 Peter 1:3-4 (The Message) Fear is nothing new. It’s been with us from the very beginning! In the Garden of Eden, Adam hid from God and said, “I was afraid.” Humans have been living in fear of God and each other ever since. Fear is based on ignorance. That means truth is the only cure—and truth can only be found in God’s Word. The Bible is full of commands. But do you know which one is the most common? Don’t be afraid. You’ll find it 365 times in Scripture—including several times at the time of Jesus' resurrection. “Don’t be afraid” were the first words the angel told those who showed up at the tomb on Easter morning. They were also the first words Jesus spoke after the resurrection. It’s no wonder why it’s a common theme in the Bible: Fear is humanity’s most common problem. You might not think you’re a fearful person. But you rarely realize how many of your decisions are based on fear, such as the fear of what people think of you and the fear of failure. Because of the resurrection of Jesus Christ, you can now live without fear. The Bible says in 2 Corinthians 5:14-15, “[Jesus] included everyone in his death so that everyone could also be included in his life, a resurrection life, a far better life than people ever lived on their own” (The Message). When you live according to the resurrection of Christ, the Bible says you’re living a better life, a life free from fear. In fact, there are five truths about the resurrection that will set you free from fear if you understand them. First, you know Jesus tells you the truth. Throughout history many people have claimed to be God or the Messiah—but only one proved it. The Bible says, “[Jesus] was declared to be God’s Son with great power by rising from the dead” (Romans 1:4 NCV). Without the resurrection, you couldn’t trust anything Jesus said. But you can trust what Jesus says about God, heaven, and everything else he taught because he rose from the dead like he said he would. When you understand Jesus tells the truth and that you can trust what he says, it becomes easier to let go of your fears. Second, you know death isn’t the end. Until Jesus rose from the dead, you didn’t know if there was life after death, because there was no proof. Jesus changed that. The Bible tells us, “God raised the Lord Jesus from the dead, and we know that God will also raise us with Jesus” (2 Corinthians 4:14 NCV). You don’t need to fear death, because Jesus’ resurrection shows us that death isn’t the end of the story. It’s really the beginning of your eternal life in God’s presence. Third, you know God loves you extravagantly. God didn’t just send you a postcard with a note saying how much he loves you. He cared enough to send the very best—himself! When Jesus was dying on the cross with his arms outstretched, he was saying: “I love you this much.” Fear and love cannot exist in the same place. The Bible tells us, “There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear” (1 John 4:18 NIV). When you invite Christ into the front door of your heart, fear goes out the back door. Fourth, you know God has a good plan for your life. When you open yourself up to God’s love, he takes care of your past, present, and future. Because of the resurrection, your sins are forgiven, you get a purpose for living, and you get a home in heaven. The Bible describes it like this: “Because Jesus was raised from the dead, we’ve been given a brand-new life and have everything to live for, including a future in heaven—and the future starts now!” (1 Peter 1:3-4 The Message) You won’t get that kind of life anywhere else. You only get it through the power of Jesus’ resurrection. Finally, you know God will take care of your needs. One of the reasons you struggle with fear is that you worry about tomorrow—and worry can’t change anything! It won’t add a single moment to your life, and it won’t solve a single problem. But the resurrection guarantees that God will meet all of your needs—starting with your salvation—by providing you with the power of his resurrection. Paul writes, “I also pray that you will understand the incredible greatness of God’s power for us who believe him. This is the same mighty power that raised Christ from the dead and seated him in the place of honor at God’s right hand in the heavenly realms” (Ephesians 1:19-20 NLT). You might remind yourself that because Jesus was raised from the dead, you are no longer a prisoner to fear. That’s news so good that you will want to share it! “Make allowance for each other’s faults, and forgive anyone who offends you. Remember, the Lord forgave you, so you must forgive others.”
Colossians 3:13 (NLT) Showing grace to others is what God wants us to do, but it’s not always easy because we’re so often focused on ourselves. It’s easier sometimes to be selfish instead of gracious. Maybe you see the slow clerk at the grocery store as an interruption to your day rather than somebody who might be struggling to keep his job—or who just got the worst news of his life. You may see a family member who’s struggling right now as a drain on you rather than someone who feels hopeless over a desperate situation. Or you see the person who cut you off on the freeway as your worst enemy rather than someone in need of God’s love. We all need God’s love. That’s why Jesus Christ came into this world. He came to show people grace. The ultimate way God does this is through forgiveness. And the ultimate way he asks you to show grace to other people is by forgiving them. Colossians 3:13 says, “Make allowance for each other’s faults, and forgive anyone who offends you. Remember, the Lord forgave you, so you must forgive others” (NLT). People often ask, “How can I find the strength to forgive? I don’t have it in me.” None of us do! The only place you might find the strength to forgive is in remembering how much Jesus has forgiven us. When remembering that, then he gives us the strength and grace to forgive others. Clara Barton, who founded the Red Cross, was reminded by a friend of an especially cruel thing that someone had done to her years before. Barton seemed not to recall it, and the friend asked, “Don’t you remember?” Her famous reply was, “No, I distinctly remember forgetting it.” What do you need to forget? If you don’t forgive, you’re not going to enjoy God’s vision for the rest of your life, because unforgiveness will keep you stuck in the past. When it seems impossible—when you feel like you can’t be gracious toward someone—remember this: Jesus forgave you. Remembering the grace God has shown you will give you the strength to be gracious to and forgive others. “Let us come boldly to the throne of our gracious God. There we will receive his mercy, and we will find grace to help us when we need it most."
Hebrews 4:16 (NLT) You don’t have to be hesitant or shy about coming to God for forgiveness. The Bible says, “Let us come boldly to the throne of our gracious God. There we will receive his mercy, and we will find grace to help us when we need it most” (Hebrews 4:16 NLT). At the throne of grace, you don’t find scolding, punishment, or rejection. When you come to God with your sin, you receive his mercy and grace. What’s the difference between mercy and grace? Mercy is forgiveness for all the wrongs you’ve done in the past. Grace is the power to change in the future. You need both. God says that when you come to him with honesty and humility, you will receive his forgiveness. But here's how not to approach God for forgiveness. Don’t beg God. He wants to forgive you more than you want to be forgiven. Don’t bargain or bribe. Don’t promise: “God, I’ll never do it again! I’ll live this kind of life. I’ll tithe 20 percent.” Don’t beg. Don’t bargain. Just believe. What do you need to believe? Believe God’s promise in Hebrews 4:16 that, when you come to God, you’ll find mercy and grace. How should you approach God for forgiveness? Just confess. Confession is not saying, “God, I’ll never do it again.” It’s saying, “You’re right, God. I was wrong.” The Bible says in Romans 5:1, “Since we have been justified [that is, acquitted of sin, declared blameless before God] by faith, [let us grasp the fact that] we have peace with God . . . through our Lord Jesus Christ” (AMP). What does it mean to be justified? It means “just as if I’d never sinned.” Wouldn’t you like to have a heart that’s washed clean? No matter how deep the stain of your sin, God can remove the stain and renew your heart just as if you’d never sinned. “Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice. Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.”
Ephesians 4:31-32 (NIV) If you’re like most people, you might have some misconceptions about what it means to forgive. And, because you don’t understand forgiveness, you find it really difficult to forgive. As a follower of Jesus, you need to understand forgiveness. The Bible clearly calls Christians to forgive. Galatians 6:1 says, “Brothers and sisters, if someone is caught in a sin, you who live by the Spirit should restore that person gently” (NIV). So, if God expects you to forgive others, what does healthy, biblical forgiveness look like? Here are four things you should do when you need to forgive someone. 1. Recognize no one is perfect. When you hate somebody, you tend to lose your perspective about that person. Resentment, bitterness, and hurt make you stop seeing that person as a fellow human being. You treat them like an animal. But the truth is everyone is in the same boat. The Bible says, “Not a single person on earth is always good and never sins” (Ecclesiastes 7:20 NLT). We’re all imperfect. 2. Relinquish your right to get even. This is the heart of forgiveness. The Bible says, “Never avenge yourselves. Leave that to God, for he has said that he will repay those who deserve it” (Romans 12:19 TLB). Even if you think you deserve to retaliate, don’t. If the hurt runs deep, you may have to commit over and over again to not getting even. But, no matter what, leave the repayment to God. 3. Respond to evil with good. Humanly speaking, it’s nearly impossible to respond to evil with good. You’ll need God’s help. You’ll need the love of Jesus to fill you up. Why? “[Love] keeps no record of wrongs” (1 Corinthians 13:5 NIV). When you can respond to evil with good, you’ll know you’ve fully released someone from the wrong they’ve done to you. 4. Refocus on God’s plan for your life. As long as you continue to focus on the person who has hurt you, that person controls you. In fact, it often goes a step further: If you don’t release your offender, you will begin to resemble your offender. So stop focusing on the hurt and the person who hurt you. Instead, refocus on God’s purpose for your life—his purpose is greater than any problem or pain you might be facing. Don’t sit another day in your resentment. If you’ve been holding on to pain caused by someone else, go through these four steps and move on to the life you were created to live! |
AuthorTaken from Daily Hope by Rick Warren. Categories
All
Archives
July 2024
|