“I waited patiently for the LORD's help; then he listened to me and heard my cry."
Psalm 40:1 (GNT) God isn’t in a hurry with your spiritual growth. You may think he’s in a hurry, but he’s not. He’s using your current circumstances to develop your character and make you stronger. He’s patient. Most people, on the other hand, are impatient. Many of our problems are caused by our inability to wait. We get into debt because we don’t know how to delay gratification, buying things we don’t need with money we don’t have to impress people we don’t even like. Some people even get into relationships they shouldn’t get into because they don’t know how to delay gratification. They say, “I want sex now; I don’t want to wait” or “I want companionship now, even if it’s with the wrong person.” And their impatience leads to problems. The good news is that, with prayer, you can recover from problems caused by your impatience. The Bible says, “I waited patiently for the LORD‘s help; then he listened to me and heard my cry” (Psalm 40:1 GNT). Remember: God is never in a hurry. Did you know there isn’t an example of Jesus running anywhere in the Bible? In fact, it took him three days to go a mile and a half to get to his friend, Lazarus, who was very sick. And by the time Jesus got to him, it was too late—Lazarus had already died. But Jesus had a bigger plan in mind. He didn’t want to heal Lazarus—he wanted to raise him from the dead. He wanted to do a miracle. And that’s exactly what happened. Jesus walked up to Lazarus’ tomb, told them to roll the stone away, and said, “Lazarus, come forth.” And Lazarus did! Sometimes a situation can get so bad that it makes you want to take matters into your own hands. But don’t take shortcuts. Instead, trust in God’s perfect timing and expect a miracle! The Bible says, “Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer” (Romans 12:12 NIV). God already knows what he’s going to do in your life next month, next year, and in the next decade. His timing is perfect, and his plan for your life is good and worth waiting for.
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“Love has no fear, because perfect love expels all fear. If we are afraid . . . this shows that we have not fully experienced his perfect love."
1 John 4:18 (NLT) Insecurity ruins relationships. But when you open your life to others, even though they could potentially hurt you, you’ll come alive in ways you’ve never experienced before. Why does insecurity ruin relationships? Because it prevents intimacy. You long to be close, but you also fear being close. You long to have intimacy with others, but it also scares you to death. You can’t get close to someone if there’s fear in the relationship. This is why living together doesn’t work in the long run. There’s no lifetime commitment. You never know when somebody is going to walk out. But fear vanishes, and intimacy—real intimacy—rises when two people say, “We’re committed no matter what. We’re going to make this thing work.” What do you fear in your relationships? Maybe you don’t want people to find out what you’re really like—so you hide yourself. This is the oldest fear, all the way back to Adam, the first man. He said, “I was afraid because I was naked; so I hid” (Genesis 3:10 NIV). When you’re afraid, you get insecure and hide who you are. You cover up, not just physically but emotionally. You build walls around yourself and pretend to be someone you’re not. But while insecurity ruins relationships, love builds them up. The Bible says in 1 John 4:18, “Love has no fear, because perfect love expels all fear. If we are afraid . . . this shows that we have not fully experienced his perfect love” (NLT). Love takes the focus off you and puts the focus on the other person. But the only way to love others is to realize that God loves you more than you can ever imagine. Suddenly, you don’t have to prove yourself to anyone anymore, and your identity and self-worth aren’t caught up in what others think. Instead, they’re caught up in your relationship with Jesus. You may have had some relational disasters in your life. Welcome to the human race. But in order to open up to others and fight insecurity, God wants you to first open up to Jesus, letting him fill you with his love so you can share it with others. “Be humble, thinking of others as better than yourselves . . . You must have the same attitude that Christ Jesus had. Though he was God, he did not think of equality with God as something to cling to."
Philippians 2:3, 5-6 (NLT) The ability to be humble is a relationship builder. What is humility? It’s when you honor others above yourself, not always demanding or clinging to your rights. Pride, on the other hand, destroys relationships—and it shows up in a lot of different ways. It can make you critical, judgmental, competitive, stubborn, and unforgiving. Proverbs 16:18 says, “Pride leads to destruction; a proud attitude brings ruin” (NCV). Pride is also self-deceiving. When you have a problem with pride, you struggle to see it in your life. But everyone else can see it in you! What does pride look like in a relationship? One, you always offer advice but never ask for it. Two, you can’t admit when you’ve had a tough week. Everybody else is saying, “Yeah, this last week was tough.” But you can’t seem to admit you have any problems. But how does humility play out in a relationship? Notice the five relationship builders in 1 Peter 3:8: “Live in harmony, be sympathetic, love each other, have compassion, and be humble” (GW). The first four are really built on the fifth one: Be humble. And it’s an excellent model for relationships. How does humility happen in your life? It happens by letting Jesus control your thoughts, heart, attitudes, and reactions. Growing in humility has to include Jesus. The basic law of relationships is this: You tend to become like the people you spend time with. If you spend time with grumpy people, you get grumpier. If you spend time with happy people, you get happier. If you want to have more humility, spend time with Jesus Christ in prayer and reading his Word. Just talk to him. He is humble and wants a relationship with you. Growing in humility may seem like a tall order, but it’s possible with Jesus. Take the first step toward humility and become a relationship builder today. “Look out for one another's interests, not just for your own."
Philippians 2:4 (GNT) Selflessness brings out the best in others. It builds relationships. What does it mean to be selfless? It means you think a little less of yourself and a little more of others. The opposite of selflessness is selfishness. It’s the number one cause of conflict and arguments. The Bible says, “What causes fights and quarrels among you? Don’t they come from your desires that battle within you? You want something but don’t get it” (James 4:1-2 NIV). Self-centeredness destroys relationships. The problem is, being selfish is human nature. We naturally think about our interests, our hurts, how we look, and how we feel. Even culture tells us: “Do what you think is best for you.” But the Bible says, “Look out for one another’s interests, not just for your own” (Philippians 2:4 GNT). What happens when you “look out for one another’s interests, not just for your own”? Not only will it transform your relationships—it will transform people. It causes the other person to change because you’re not the same person anymore, allowing them to relate to you in a different way. I’ve seen it many times: When you treat cranky, unlikable people with kindness, instead of treating them the way they deserve, they transform into nice people. The greatest lesson in life is learning to be unselfish—but it won’t happen overnight. It’s going to take the rest of your life. The good news is, God doesn’t leave you all alone to learn how to be selfless. Romans 8:26 says, “The Holy Spirit helps us in our weakness” (NLT). Never stop making the effort to be more selfless. God’s Spirit is with you to help you break the cycle of selfishness! And it’s then will you see transformation in all your relationships. “And let steadfastness have its perfect work, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing."
James 1:4 (ESV) Be patient with God and with yourself. God’s timetable is rarely the same as yours. You’re often in a hurry—but God isn’t. It can be frustrating when it feels like the progress you’re making is slow. But remember this: God is never in a hurry, but he is always on time. He will use your entire lifetime to prepare you for your role in eternity. The Bible is filled with examples of how God uses a long process to develop character, especially in leaders. He took 80 years to prepare Moses, including 40 in the wilderness. For those 14,600 wilderness days, Moses kept waiting and wondering, “Is it time?” But God kept saying, “Not yet.” Great souls are grown through struggles, storms, and seasons of suffering. Be patient with the process. James advised, “Don’t try to get out of anything prematurely. Let it do its work so you become mature and well-developed” (James 1:4 The Message). Don’t get discouraged. When Habakkuk became depressed because he didn’t think God was acting quickly enough, God said: “These things I plan won’t happen right away. Slowly, steadily, surely, the time approaches when the vision will be fulfilled. If it seems slow, do not despair, for these things will surely come to pass. Just be patient! They will not be overdue a single day!” (Habakkuk 2:3 TLB). Remember how far you’ve come, not just how far you have to go. You are not where you want to be, but neither are you where you used to be. Years ago people wore a popular button with the letters PBPGINFWMY. It stood for “Please be patient. God is not finished with me yet.” God isn’t finished with you either. Be patient with him and with yourself. And keep on moving forward. “Practice these things. Devote your life to them so that everyone can see your progress.”
Timothy 4:15 (GW) The moment you give your life to Jesus, he gives you a brand-new nature. But you will still have old habits, patterns, and practices that need to be removed and replaced. It’s a lifelong process, but here are two bits of guidance to help you on the journey. Let go of the fears that keep you from growing. The truth will set you free, but it often makes you miserable first. The fear of what you might discover if you honestly face your character defects can keep you living in the prison of denial. Only as God is allowed to shine the light of his truth on your faults, failures, and hang-ups can you begin to work on them. This is why you cannot grow without a humble, teachable attitude. Stop basing your identity around your “defects.” You say, “It’s just like me to be . . .” or “It’s just the way I am.” The unconscious worry is that if you let go of your hurt, hang-up, or habit, you won’t know who you are anymore. This fear can definitely slow your growth. Remember that your character is the sum total of your habits—and good habits take time to develop. You can’t claim to have integrity unless it’s your habit to always be honest. A husband who is faithful to his wife most of the time is not faithful at all! Your habits define your character. Remember: You have to practice every day the habits that will make you more like Christ. “Devote your life to them so that everyone can see your progress” (1 Timothy 4:15 GW). “We are each responsible for our own conduct.”
Galatians 6:5 (NLT) Your choices are far more powerful than your circumstances. You can see that clearly in how you spend your time. You may not like how complicated and busy your life has become. But with few exceptions, no one is forcing you to keep your life complicated. You have the power to simplify your life. In fact, God expects you to assume responsibility for your calendar and to carefully choose how you spend your time. Do you know how much time you have here on earth? You have just enough time to do God’s will. In other words, you’ve been given just enough time to fulfill your purpose. When you try to do more than God planned for you, it’s only natural that you find yourself constantly out of time or stressed over your schedule. You may have heard the saying: If the Devil can’t make you bad, he’ll make you busy. He’ll get you so busy that you don’t have time for the important stuff—time alone with God, ministry, and mission. What do you need to let go of? The Bible says in 1 Corinthians 10:23, “‘Everything is permissible,’ but not everything is helpful” (HCSB). What does that mean? It means this: A lot of things aren’t necessarily wrong; they’re just not necessary. Life often means choosing either “Am I going to do something good?” or “Am I going to do what’s best?” Take some time this week to pray over your calendar. Ask God to show you what parts of it are part of his purpose for you. As you do this, I pray that you will find relief from stress and a new sense of satisfaction as you do only the things God created you to do. “He guides me along the right paths for his name’s sake.”
Psalm 23:3 (NIV) People often fear making the wrong decision, and that creates stress. Maybe you’re facing a decision about a major issue: Should I hold on, or should I let go? Should I get in, or should I get out? Should I get married? Should I find a new job? Should I move? When you can’t make up your mind, you stagger through life. In fact, the Bible says in James 1 that when you remain double-minded, you become unstable in everything you do. The Greek word for unstable literally means “stagger like a drunk.” But God says there is an antidote to your indecision. Psalm 23:3 says, “He guides me along the right paths for his name’s sake” (NIV). You’ll be able to handle the stress of decision-making when you let God guide you. You may be thinking, “But I’ve tried this!” You asked God to guide you, but then you became more confused than you were before. You still couldn’t figure it out. Now you wonder, “Why is knowing God’s will so difficult?” Is God playing games with you? Of course not! God wants to guide you. He wants you to know his will more than you want to know it. The problem is you often look for the wrong thing when you’re trying to find God’s will. For example, you may look for a feeling. You want to be swept off our feet by some emotion so you can say, “That’s how I know what God’s will is!” You may want a methodical approach to God’s will. You want someone to give you a recipe or a formula to follow. Or perhaps you take a magical approach to God’s will. You’re looking for God to do some fantastic sign—write it in the sky, call you on the phone, send you an email. All of these ways lead to frustration and cause you to miss God’s will. God’s will is not a feeling, a formula, or something he wants you to be frustrated or fearful about. God does not want you confused, and he does not want you to stress over making any decision. The next time you’re making a big decision, rest in the truth that God will guide you along the right paths—every step of the way. “Be careful how you think; your life is shaped by your thoughts.”
Proverbs 4:23 (GNT) God is far more interested in changing your mind than changing your circumstances. You want God to take away all of the problems, pain, sorrow, suffering, sickness, and sadness. But God wants to work on you first—because transformation won’t happen in your life until you renew your mind, until your thoughts begin to change. Why is it so important that you learn how to manage your mind? Let me give you three reasons . . . Manage your mind because your thoughts control your life. Proverbs 4:23 says, “Be careful how you think; your life is shaped by your thoughts” (GNT). Your thoughts have tremendous ability to shape your life for good or for bad. For example, maybe you accepted the thought someone told you when you were growing up: “You’re worthless. You don’t matter.” If you accepted that thought, even though it was wrong, it shaped your life. Manage your mind because the mind is the battleground for sin. All temptation happens in the mind. Paul says in Romans 7:22-23, “I love to do God’s will so far as my new nature is concerned; but there is something else deep within me, in my lower nature, that is at war with my mind and wins the fight and makes me a slave to the sin that is still within me. In my mind I want to be God’s willing servant, but instead I find myself still enslaved to sin” (TLB). One of the reasons why you get mentally fatigued is because there’s a battle in your brain 24 hours a day. It’s debilitating because it’s intense, and it’s intense because your mind is your greatest asset. Satan wants your greatest asset! Manage your mind because it’s the key to peace and happiness. An unmanaged mind leads to tension; a managed mind leads to tranquility. An unmanaged mind leads to conflict; a managed mind leads to confidence. An unmanaged mind leads to stress. (When you don’t try to control your mind and the way you direct your thoughts, you will have an enormous amount of stress in your life.) But a managed mind leads to strength, security, and serenity. The Bible teaches, “Letting your sinful nature control your mind leads to death. But letting the Spirit control your mind leads to life and peace” (Romans 8:6 NLT). Choose life and peace for yourself today. “Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind.”
Romans 12:2 (NIV) If you want to have lasting change in your life, you need to refocus your mind. Specifically, you need to change your thought patterns away from what you don’t want to focus on and toward what you do want to focus on. Because whatever you focus on is what you move toward. Romans 12:2 says, “Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind” (Romans 12:2 NIV). That’s the blueprint you need in order to change your thought patterns. Let’s look at each part:
How does this happen? The Bible tells you in Ephesians 4:22-24 “to put off your old self, which is being corrupted by its deceitful desires; to be made new in the attitude of your minds; and to put on the new self, created to be like God in true righteousness and holiness” (NIV). This means you are going to have to do some putting off and you are going to have to do some putting on—and the putting off has to happen before the putting on. It’s just like trying on clothes in a department store. Before you can try on the new stuff, you have to take off the old stuff. Start today with beginning to let go of the old attitudes, thought patterns, and images you’ve been living with. Then get ready to put on the new garments God has for you. |
AuthorTaken from Daily Hope by Rick Warren. Categories
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