“We know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose” (Romans 8:28 NIV).
We’re all broken people. We’re all imperfect. Sometimes we hurt each other intentionally or unintentionally. Life isn’t fair. Innocent people suffer. Everyone has experienced unfair or prejudicial treatment in some way. How do you respond to it? If you start dwelling on it and stewing, spewing, and worrying, your soul takes a hit. Grudges over what others have done to you will hurt your soul, impairing your thoughts, emotions, and decisions. Resentment, bitterness, retaliation, and revenge will damage you. The Bible actually says that God’s going to even the score. Judgment is coming one day. People who were mistreated, misjudged, or treated unfairly will receive justice. But it is not your job to avenge yourself: “Never avenge yourselves. Leave that to God, for he has said that he will repay those who deserve it” (Romans 12:19 TLB). Unaddressed grudges blind you to how much good God has done in your life. You become blind to the truth. You become blind to the needs of people around you. Your soul will not be restored until you let it go. That’s what Jesus wants to help you do. God wants to restore your soul, taking the bitter things in your life and turning them into better things. Romans 8:28 says, “We know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose (NIV). Of course, we know that not everything that happens to you is good. But can God take the bad things people do to you and use them for good? Yes. Can God take your sins and mistakes and bring good out of them? Yes. Can God take your own weaknesses and your damaged will and work good even then? Yes. Anybody can bring good out of good, but God specializes in bringing good out of bad. God turns your hurts into holiness. He turns your wounds into wisdom. He uses offenses to remove your pretenses. When you believe that God can bring good things out of very bad things, he will begin to rebuild your soul—your broken thoughts, your broken emotions, and your broken will.
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“I’m a mess. I’m nothing and have nothing; make something of me. You [God] can do it; you’ve got what it takes” (Psalm 40:17 The Message). Anger has a price tag. When you realize that truth, you’re more likely to control the anger in your life. The Bible tells us, “A hot-tempered man … gets into all kinds of trouble” (Proverbs 29:22 TLB). Most of us have seen someone do something really stupid because that person was angry. The Bible is very specific on the cost of anger. The Bible says:
You’ve probably seen all of these results from your own anger and the anger of others. The Bible is also clear on the ultimate conclusion of our inappropriately expressed anger. Proverbs 11:29 says, “The fool who provokes his family to anger and resentment will finally have nothing worthwhile left.” Think of the impact anger has on your family. As parents, we’re often tempted to use anger to motivate our children. It works in the short-term. When you get angry, you put the fear of God (or the fear of you) into your children. Your kids may give you short-term obedience, but you’ll lose in the long-term. The end result of misplaced anger is alienation. You alienate the very people you love the most. Eventually, you’ll get more anger back and finally just apathy. No one wants to be around you. The truth is, you always lose when you lose your temper. You may lose your reputation, your job, your children, or the love of your husband or wife when you don’t control your anger. And it’s never worth that price tag. "Be angry and do not sin; do not let the sun go down on your anger” (Ephesians 4:26 ESV).
We all get angry from time to time. We may handle it differently, but none of us can escape the emotion entirely. But just because we get angry doesn’t mean we’re sinning. The Bible says, “Be angry and do not sin; do not let the sun go down on your anger” (Ephesians 4:26 ESV). Paul tells us in this passage not to let our anger lead us into sin. That means that anger isn’t necessarily sin. The truth is, we can deal with our anger in both appropriate and inappropriate ways. Unfortunately, most of us express our anger in ways that get us further from our goals instead of moving us closer to them. For example, here are three things to avoid when you’re angry: Don’t suppress your anger. Don’t store it up inside. When you suppress anger without expressing it in proper ways, it’s like taking a soft drink bottle and shaking it up. One day it’s going to pop! It’ll impact your body eventually. Doctors tell us a number of physical ailments are often brought on by suppressed anger. Don’t repress it. When you repress your anger, you simply deny it’s there. Deny your anger often enough and you’ll be depressed. For many people that feel depressed, they're really just angry. They just don't think that Christians should get angry, so they simply bottle it up inside. Denying anger is a sin. It’s called lying. Don’t express it in inappropriate ways. We can express anger in a variety of inappropriate ways. We pout, spit sarcasm, manipulate, or do something stupid (get drunk, have affairs, etc.). None of those approaches get us anywhere near the result we’re looking for. So what should we do with our anger? Confess it. You don’t just admit the anger, but you also admit the cause. You tell God — and whoever you’re angry with — that you’re frustrated or you feel threatened. The more honest you can be in your relationships, the easier it will be to get to the root causes of your anger. Here’s the good news about your anger: You may have grown up in a home where anger was consistently expressed in appropriate ways. Inappropriate anger is learned, but it can be unlearned, too. You can change. You don’t have to stay the same “Stupid people express their anger openly, but sensible people are patient and hold it back” (Proverbs 29:11 GNT).
Anger confounds many people in our world today. We simply don’t know how to handle our anger like we have in the past. One of the Bible’s simplest yet most profound answers for our anger comes in Proverbs 29:11: “Stupid people express their anger openly, but sensible people are patient and hold it back” (GNT). Think before you speak. Delay is a tremendous remedy for anger. You don’t need to delay indefinitely. If you’ve got an issue you need to deal with, you need to do so. Anger delayed indefinitely becomes bitterness. That’s worse than anger. Anger isn’t always a sin. Bitterness is. If you respond impulsively, you tend to respond in anger. If you wait to talk about whatever conflict you’re dealing with, you’ll be more rational and reasonable when you do. The longer you hold your temper, the better your response will be. Give yourself time to think. When conflict arises and you give yourself time to think, what should you think about? Consider these five questions: T: Is it truthful? Is what I’m about to say the truth? H: Is it helpful? Or will it simply harm the other person? I: Is it inspirational? Does it build up or does it tear down? N: Is it necessary? If it’s not necessary, why do I need to say it? K: Is it kind? THINK before you speak. Reflect before you react. It’ll slow down your anger every time. |
AuthorTaken from Daily Hope by Rick Warren. Categories
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